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[personal profile] missthingsplace
 Okay. As i mentioned in my AN at the beginning of my last post the last year or so, give or take a few months has been rafter stressful.

It started with my some moving back home when he split up with a girlfriend and they were still living there but the landlord decided he wanted to sell the flat, Anyway, i know this sounds terrible but i knew before he even moved home that it wouldn't work. He was meant to stay with us for 6 months while he saved for a deposit for a new flat. He lasted about 4 months, we discovered he was lying to us - not going to work and going off clubbing miles away and telling us he couldn't save ot give us keep because work was rubbish. We discovered this when one of his idiot friends plastered a night out all over FaceBook. Him and his dad were already on shaky ground, i tried to stay out of it. Then hubby collected me from work one day and told he he has thrown him out. I don't know all the actual details as he wouldn't tell be but our son came home one morning - he worked nights - and went to bed (he also complained of insomnia, said he was tossing turning all day) and he didn't realise his dad was home. Hubby heard him talking and was about to enter his room when he heard stuff he didn't like so he sat outside and listened for 3 hours before barging in and telling him with he thought of what he had heard. My son yelled at him and then stormed out and he didn't come home. He is currently living with my in-laws who are mollycoddling him.

Work has been a nightmare. They have bullied us into working hours we never have before - i have been there 14 years now - and everyone is feeling much the same way. I am now having to work evenings and Saturdays (they always employed people to work these hours before we gained a new manager) and it is just a complete nightmare. There excuse was that we 'weren't a team' We are less of one now, everyone if now checking the hours everyone else it doing, getting really peed off because some people seem to be doing this more than others - we were told the we wouldn't have to do an evening and a Saturday in the same week and that it wouldn't be every week. We were lied to. I have worked both almost every week since September and both in the same week. Were also told it would only be during 'peak trading' but that has been over for weeks. I am getting to breaking point now and i intend to have a bit of a controlled strop.

Now, i would look for another job but for now i an stuck there. So, almost 5 years ago i hurt my knee, i turned on the spot and my knee didn't. It was so painful and the hospital decided i had wrenched the ligaments. No scan was done. The pain eased off in about 5 or 6 months to mostly a dull ache but about a year ago the pain started coming back slowly but surely and i ended up at the hospital where they x rayed it and i was told nothing was wrong ... i went to the doctor and told her about my suspicion that i had torn ligaments from the previous injury and she sent me for an MRI scan and then to a specialist where i discovered that not only did i indeed have torn ligaments in my knee, i also had osteoarthritis in the same knee - basically my patella (kneecap) has eroded away. This is what is causing the majority of the pain and at the end of October last year it collapsed on my three time in two weeks causing me to have to take time off of work and making me so broke at christmas - sick pay is a joke. So, at some point i am going to have to  have a knee replacement and apparently it can take 3 - 6 months to recover. 

My job involves standing for 4 hours at a time, this doesn't help in the slightest as you can probably imagine. I was in so much pain when i left work today i had trouble getting into hubby's car when he collected me. I am currently going to see a physiotherapist once a week, i have been three times so far and I'm not sure if i should go for the remaining 4 and it's not helping, in fact it is hurting more and more and i shall be telling him this when i go this week. I don't have a problem working evenings as such but as i explained when they insisted i get up in pain, it gets worse as the day goes on. Resting it all day is as bad as using it all day so their suggestion that i don't do anything all day so i can work in the evening is useless ... but they don't give a toss. I intend to tell the manager that i am not saying that i refuse to do evenings but that i need to have a week without one now and the, I have an appointment to see the specialist again in June. 

I can feel my stress levels rising again and i really don't want them how they were back in August when i felt like I spent most of my waking time away from work in tears. 

So, there we go, i hope i haven't depressed the hell out of everyone ...

Di x
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