Be Careful What You Wish For 41/65

[missthingsplace]

Title: Be Careful What You Wish For - Sequel to Heaven And Hell
Author: missthingsplace
Parings/characters: Jack/Ianto. Gwen. new team members (Chloe and Damien)
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood or any of the characters ... unfortunately.
Summary: Set after series two
Spoilers: None
Warnings: Mpreg
Rating: PG13 - NC17 For series.

A/N This ones a bit emotional ...

It was gone eleven thirty that night when Ianto found himself pulling into Tesco's car park, Jack had developed a new craving of late and they had run out. Heading into the supermarket he made his way to the freezer cabinets, searching for what was required.

Jack had a craving for ice cream, but not just any ice cream. It had to be Ben & Jerry's 'Fossil Fuel', nothing else would do and he had been bugging Ianto for the last two hours about needing it. In the end Jack threatened to go and get it himself and Ianto worried he would actually carry his threat out found himself heading for Tesco.

Ice cream located and purchased, six pots of the stuff so that this wouldn't happen again in the near future, Ianto was headed home again. And if he got there and found Jack asleep he would have to fight the urge to wake him up again for his damn ice cream. He smiled to himself as he thought it, knowing he never would.

Jack however was watching the TV, trying to fight the sleep that was threatening to overtake him. The urge to sleep was getting stronger than the craving for ice cream, but the thought that was keeping him awake was that maybe he could convince Ianto to be the dish. The thought of licking the ice cream from Ianto's body was telling a certain part of his anatomy that staying awake was the best policy.

Jack stretched out on the sofa, hands on his belly as the babies began to stir inside. He'd swear it was elbows he could feel now and not feet hitting his hands, maybe they were destined to be rugby players and not footballers he thought as he smiled to himself. He slipped his hands under his t shirt and stroked his belly, as if trying to sooth it's inhabitants.

Time was passing so fast, in ten weeks or so he and Ianto would be fathers. It seemed such a long time since their wedding, closing his eyes he thought about that day. He would remember that day forever, no matter what happened in his life he was sure it would be the one day that would never escape his memory.

This turned his thoughts to his own immortality, which in turn led to the thought that he always tried to avoid, that fact that he would lose Ianto at some point. His hands pressed harder on his belly, he would out live his children too, there was no reason why they would inherit his ability to not stay dead.

When Ianto reentered the house a few minutes later he headed straight to the kitchen to put the ice cream in the freezer, sure that Jack would now be asleep. As he closed the freezer do he became aware that he could hear sobbing, heart wrenching sobbing. He flung his coat on the kitchen table and rushed to the living room, where the sound was coming from.

Ianto saw his partner curled up on the sofa sobbing his heart out into a cushion, he sat next to him and pulled him into his arms, wrapping them around Jack tight as Jack sobbed into his shoulder.

What's the matter, is it the babies, are you in pain?' Ianto asked worried.

Jack shook his head against Ianto's shoulder, gulping deeply as he tried to stop himself sobbing.

'It's okay, whatever it is let it out.'

Jack clung tightly to Ianto as he stopped trying to fight the tears and sobbed loudly against Ianto's shoulder. Ianto held him quietly, whatever it was Jack was in too much of a state to tell him now. They could talk about it later.

It was over an hour later when Jack finally pulled away from Ianto's embrace, his eyes puffy and red rimmed. Ianto kissed him softly on the lips, Jack kissed back with the same tenderness for the short kiss.

'Tell me.' Ianto told him softly.

'It's nothing, just hormones.'

'Nothing wouldn't have you sobbing like that, pregnant or not.'

'Okay, I ...' Jack broke off, worried he'd start crying again.

'It's okay, I'm here.'

'I was thinking about the babies, how fast time seemed to be passing, that we would be fathers soon.'

'And that upset you?' Ianto was a little confused.

'No. Then I thought about our wedding day and how it was the most perfect day of my life and that I would never forget it in the future, no matter what happened.'

'And then?' Ianto had a feeling he knew what was coming.

'I started thinking about how I would outlive you and the babies, losing you will be bad enough, but no one should outlive their children.'

'Jack, we know there's nothing we can do to change this, I wish there was, I wish forever meant the same for me as it did for you. I hate the thought of when I die that I will be leaving you, that I can't come back to you. I love you Jack and I can't imagine how much hurt it will cause you when my life is over and I hate myself for that sometimes.'

Jack watched as tears now began to fall down Ianto's face as he continued.

'We can't get upset about the future, we have to live for the here and now. We love each other, enough to get married and have children. Children I never imagined having because my husband is an amazing man, and when they are born we will love them for being them and cross any bridges when we come to them, no matter how hard they prove to be.'

'But we can't ignore it, pretend it's never going to happen.'

'No, we just have to take things as they come and hope we have each other for as long as possible.'

'How can you be so rational?'

'I believe we were destined for each other we should not waste a minute of it worrying about what ifs.'

'I'm being hormonal and silly aren't I?'

'No, hormonal yes, silly no. Just showing me how much you love me.'

'More than anyone else I've ever loved.'

'And that is something I always want to hear.' Ianto smiled weakly through his tears.

'I think the babies agree with you, their kicking me like mad.'

'You're upset, they're picking up on it.'

'I guess.'

'We need to settle your emotions and then they will relax again.'

'I'm feeling better already.'

Ianto wiped his tears away and smiled before leaning forward and kissing Jack tenderly, as Jack responded their kisses comforting each other as they tried to block out the sadness they had been confronting. There was no lust or passion in their kiss, just love.

They shifted so they were lying on the sofa, breaking their kiss briefly as they moved before moving back into each others arms again, it was a good couple of hours before they moved to their bedroom. It was only when Jack began to doze in Ianto's arms he insisted they went to bed.

Jack was asleep the moment his head hit the pillow, shattered physically and emotionally. Ianto watched his lover sleep for a while, he often worried how Jack would cope when he died and tonight's conversation had done nothing to quell those thoughts.

Rolling over onto his side, against Jack's sleeping form he placed a hand on Jack's belly and forced himself to think about the babies instead. He knew that the hormones flooding Jack's body were the reason for his upset this evening but it didn't make it easier to take. He would be happy when the twins were born for that reason as well.

Ianto finally let sleep take him, slipping into a dream where he and Jack were playing football with two little boys, then suddenly became two little girls. He smiled to himself in his sleep, these babies would be the most wanted babies in the world he told himself in his dream.

The next morning he woke late and alone, but even from the bedroom upstairs he could smell toast cooking. He lay in bed a little longer, his dream still playing over in his head, trying to hold on to it for as long as possible till he heard Jack walking up the stairs.

'Breakfast.' Jack announced as he walked through the door with a tray, containing a pot of tea, piles of toast and jars of marmalade and jam.

'And what did I do to deserve this?' Ianto smiled.

'Putting up with my hormones, being here for me, loving me.'

'Always gorgeous.'

Jack placed the tray on the bed and kissed him softly. 'Thank you beautiful.'

TBC

Comments

[bandgeek01.livejournal.com]

I love this. Poor Jack.


Nicole

[missthingsplace.livejournal.com]

Thank you :D